Tips to Reframe Your Language

Instead of ASKING why, reframe your language

Kids are constantly bombarded with questions all day. The “why” questions may add pressure and shame to the child. Reframing your language is so important. Here are some examples:

Why did you hit your sister? —>
I won’t let you hit. It’s my job to keep everyone safe. I know you are mad at her for taking your toy. I get it. You may say “when I’m done with my turn, you may have a turn.”

Why aren’t you getting dressed? —>
Let’s put our socks and shoes on together.

Why aren’t you eating your vegetables? —>
It’s my job to make sure your body grows. You have to eat lots of different foods to help your body grow. (But remember to not force your child to eat)

Why are you getting out of bed? —>
You are having a really hard time right now staying in bed. I get it- you want to stay with me. It’s my job to make sure your body grows. It’s time to rest your body. Tomorrow, we will start our bed time earlier so we have more time to spend together. *there may be more to it with this. When a child is getting out of bed, they are telling you they need more connection or they may need to process their day. They need closure.