Nanny Interview
A nanny is an incredibly important job; they are helping to raise your children, thus they are essentially an extension of you. When you think of it that way, it becomes clear how important it is to find someone you as the parent/caregiver work well with. When you and nanny work well together, the children respect both parent and nanny. When you aren’t on the same page, it can cause confusion and potential anxiety in your child.
Given the intimacy of the job, it’s important you take your time interviewing candidates. I personally used an agency to help me source the people that I interviewed and help with background checks. Word of mouth recommendations and referrals are also a great way to find a nanny and provides the reassurance of being vetted by someone in your personal network.
Below are some of the questions that I use when interviewing someone I am interested in having in our home. Of course, the questions will vary depending on your child’s age, if you have multiple children, what your style and needs are, etc. I recommend you first write out what your needs, goals, and expectations are so that nothing gets lost in translation or is surprising. This can also be included in your child care agreement, which I describe in greater detail below. You also want to give the nanny time to interview you to make sure it’s a good match and they feel comfortable and aligned with you too.
I start off by asking them to tell me about their background: what is/was their family dynamic like (do they have siblings, did they help care for them when growing up, etc.) and what is their school/job experience. I will ask if they have had any jobs besides being a nanny, as well as if they have had any long-term nanny jobs (3+ years). I also will ask what a typical day at their previous nanny job(s) looked like, what their parenting style/approach was, and how they help create a rhythm for the children.
More specific to my family, I ask how they handle multiple children. I am curious to see if they have a good system or routine down. If caretaking will include going on outings, I will ask them to explain how they unload children from the car when they have two little ones to manage. This helps give a sense of their safety awareness.
I will also ask how they bathe the kids to get a sense of their safety skills (questions include do they run bath and then go get things, how high does the bath water go, do they have towels ready to go, etc.).
I am curious about how they prep a meal with the child/children too. Do they involve them? Do they ask to put them in front of a screen? Do they prep the meal during nap time?
I will offer a scenario of a child talking back and ask how they would handle it. I would also ask what they would do if a child asked them to keep a secret.
While how to handle some if not all these situations can be taught, I want to get a sense of both the prospective nanny’s instincts and experience, as well as if they are okay taking direction and also giving feedback to parent(s). You want to make sure you can communicate well together and find out if they are used to or open to collaborating with the parents. Some only have experience and/or are interested in being a full-charge nanny; some nanny’s are opposed to working with a stay-at-home or work-from-home parent; and some will be open to working together.
For me personally, I like to make sure our nanny doesn’t feel the need to constantly entertain my child as I want my kids to learn how to play independently. I am going to want to work with a nanny that is comfortable doing an activity on their own such as knitting, crocheting, or reading a book while the child plays. Or they can fold the child’s clothes while the child plays if they have that responsibility.
Another area of importance to me is non (or at least less) toxic lifestyle choices, which can also be taught and supported, but also offer me insight into the prospective nanny’s willingness to adjust or adapt to more healthy choices. While the products I have in our home make it easy enough to accommodate, I also want to make sure there is a mutual understanding if they take the kids outside the home. This also may impact what they are bringing into our home, including snacks, laundry detergent and products they are using on themself, etc. I make sure to highlight that no fragrances can be used in our home due to the toxicity. I always try to make an effort to gift certain products that I am buying for myself to my nanny (ie deodorants, lotions etc).
Circling back to getting to know a bit more about the individual, I will ask questions about what they like to do for fun during free time to get a broader sense of the kind of person they are and their values. I would also ask what their ideal job would be. Beyond the questions I ask, I am also looking to see how they are dressed as that gives me a sense of professionalism. Are they wearing a lot of jewelry, flashy make-up, revealing clothing, is their hair tied back, etc. Working with children requires simplicity so not to detract from what a child is doing. Just like your child’s teacher, doctor, or therapist, you expect your nanny to dress appropriately.
While this is not entirely comprehensive of the questions I ask during an interview, this helps to give me a sense of what additional questions or areas I would like the person I am interviewing to elaborate on. And as I mentioned before, make sure to give the nanny candidate time to ask you questions. You want to ensure they also feel comfortable working with you.
I also always do a paid trial and have the nanny shadow me for several days. Then if I have time, I shadow them.
Once you have found a nanny to work with you and your family, you will want to have a child care agreement that they sign off on. Your child care agreement may include the following:
• Expectations
• Responsibilities
• Parenting philosophy
• Car Rules (car safety; where they are allowed to go; if they are using their own car, car seat safety, mileage reimbursement)
• First aid/fire/safety issues
• Approved activities and not approved activities
• Screen time usage
• Cell phone usage
• Vaccine status
• Sick days
• Vacation/PTO
• COVID policy
• Guaranteed hours; they should be paid hourly as they are not allowed to be a salaried employee
• Overtime
• Weekly or bi-weekly payments and W2 provided
• Travel expectations
• Termination notice (2-4 weeks)
Additional potential perks:
• Healthcare benefits or stipend
• Professional development courses/conferences
• Food provided while at work
• Credit card (so no need for reimbursements)