When toddlers get rough... 👋 👋 👋

Your automatic response might be "we don't hit" but that is a difficult concept to grasp, especially since toddlers don't know their own strength. Try to observe the situation and figure out what your toddler is trying to convey to you.

1. Is a child or sibling in their space?

2. Is a child or sibling taking a toy that they want?

3. Are they trying to tell you something and can’t verbally express it? (Take out to get a rise from you)

The first thing to say and do is to make your hand flat and put it in between the children and say "I am putting my hand here to keep everybody safe. It’s my job to keep everybody safe” and then it is really about trying to observe what the child is trying to convey. See above points ⬆️

You want to connect the need with the child. It is really important to slow the child down and equalize their breathing and getting them out of their flight or fight mode when they are so worked up. Calmly saying "let me see your hands" and holding them and saying "these kind hands are for helping."

Now toddler hitting... kids don’t know their own strengths💪 What you can do is demonstrate for your child what a soft touch looks and feels like by taking your hand and placing it on their face, saying “this is what gentle feels like. Now you show me on my face how gentle feels.” That way they have a physical example of what their touch feels like.

If your child hits another child...squatting down and saying to the other child "would you like them to use gentle hands. Show me on your face what gentle hands feels like" and have them show what gentle hands feels like. Give them a chance for redemption by saying "how can you help your friend? Can you get them some water or an ice pack or maybe draw them a picture?" This allows them to take responsibility for their unkindness.

Do you find your child hitting you, siblings or friends???